Two Days and Counting

I'm still feeling yucky. My stomach isn't treating me very well - especially in the evenings - and unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to it. The only thing I could surmise from the last two evenings is that at each evening meal I had a little bit (like a swig) of alcohol. Guess I won't be doing that again any time soon.

In addition to the crappy stomach flu (no pun intended), I now have a head cold that is making it hard to breathe. It doesn't seem to be the same thing that my Sister and Nephew has - and that my 10 month old nephew has been in the hospital with for almost a week now. It seems more like the crud my little won has had in his nose for a week or so. It's slowing me down a bit...

The good news is that my 2.4 year old hasn't breastfed for two full days! I'm not exactly following the prescribed 'don't offer, don't refuse" advice of LLL, but I'm not exactly setting the agenda for breastfeeding cessation either. Don't get me wrong, the breastfeeding experience has been difficult from the beginning and I've practially wanted to stop from the moment we began. However, as you've probably gathered from this blog thus far, I'm a bit conflicted about many things that this wonderful life has to offer. Well, conflicted might not be the best descriptor. It's probably more like too aware of and willing to consider all of the options and such. However, regarding breastfeeding: I've merely been setting limits as to the time and location of nursing. Not at daycare, in the car, or away from home. Only once per day, after we do blah, blah, blah.... He seems to forget his request once we are doing other things like getting ready for bed or reading books. And with no major meltdowns, either.

I am feeling very good about the prospect of having my breasts back to myself (and to my husband). I think it's because it's been such a difficult road (I'll sit and write about my pregnancy, labor, delivery, difficulties breastfeeding, and 2 years of postpartum depression some other time) . And even though this has been rough, the thought of the little won and I being separate in that sense is a bit sad. I know he is getting bigger and in some ways more independent. I have no silly notions that he will stop needing me in many other ways for a long, long time to come (I actually relish the idea that we will continue to need me in different ways for the rest of his life). He's not potty trained, he still sleeps with me and his Papi most of the time, can't get dressed by himself, or cook his own meals yet, and crossing the street alone is pretty much out of the question (you don't say, he's only two?). So despite my feeling a bit conflicted I'm glad it's been two days and wonder how this will continue to progress. I know it's potentially going to increase before it ceases completely.

I'll keep you posted.

You can get the image above on a t-shirt for your little won at www.tshirthell.com/babyhell.shtml