A Touch of Buyers Remorse

Finally chopped off my hair. It's noticeably uneven. My sister is my stylist.

Went on vacation a couple of weeks ago. It wasn't as fabulous as others advertised it to be.

Gave up coffee.

Eating better.

Exercising daily. It's painful.

Have just as much stress as ever:

•     My mother, sister #1 with a husband and two children, and sister #2 with 1 child bought a house and are moving in together. They are making major changes and updates before moving in. I can't just help out with moving and such like I once did. I watch the little ones instead. It doesn't feel productive.
•     Twig has been crying at daycare when I drop him off and saying "I don't want to go to school, I don't want to let you go, Mommy". He's being rather willfull about potty training.
  
•     Sex is something I think about but hasn't happened in what seems like forever. 
  
•     I want to go out on a Date with my Husband but our babysitter is moving and making major changes to her new house...
  

The Doctor called me about my Test Results.

The beauty of it is that it's all okay!

Hair grows back. And it's just going to take a minute or two to get used to it. I could get a new stylist. It might make life easier in some ways...

I'll take many more vacations in my lifetime. Besides this vacation wasn't about me. It was about my kid. We did some cool stuff, like take a 1 mile hike in the mountains together.

There's always Decaf. And it's a reasonable alternative - occasionally.

It's a lot cheaper to eat Vegan, or at least vegetarian, than it is to eat meat daily. I need to remember that Junk food and Chocolate is a treat!

Sweating feels good and makes me feel stronger deep down in my soul. I LOVE Kick Boxing because when I do it, know that I could kick someone's ass! I like to walk and my clothes are fitting better. Someday soon I'll wear that Liz Caliborne dress that 's been hanging in my closet for years. Pain is necessary to achieve results, especially when it comes to exercise and weight loss.

Stress is transient.

• The move will be finished soon. Then the real drama will start but I'm planning my strategy on how to stay out of it now.
• Twig's teacher that he struggles with on occasion heard me loud and clear when I told her to do it my way and at his pace. He's not crying and telling me not to leave today. We're looking around at other preschools. To know what our options are. And we're trying to be objective about the issues at hand. Potty training will be over someday. Besides, all kids have accidents. Period.
• Maybe we'll just have to use Sesame Street as our babysitter in order to get a little bit of one on one grown-up time...
• The move will be over soon. And it's the perfect opportunity to get Hubbie to think about the fact that he can help with finding a sitter, too!
  

Got my medical test results. I'm not going to have a heart attack any time soon (whew!) but the 24 Hour EKG showed that I'm having irregular heart beats at least twice an hour.

The beauty of it is that it's all okay!

The dizzies - they're all gone and the Doctor said it may be because I quit coffee and made some other dietary changes.

The irregular heart beats are not medically problematic at this time. But, the Doctor made me promise that I'd go in immediately if I noticed any changes or other symptoms. If the dizzies or other symptoms show up or the irregular beats last for 30 seconds at a time, absolutely, I will get in to see her. I'll monitor the heartburn and call if it doesn't subside in a week or two.

I can make positive changes in my life. Yeah, it's harder than ever, but it is possible. About that I am not remorseful. About that I feel good.